Flow And Buying A House

In my last post on Flow And Intention-Manifestation, I mentioned that my husband and I had recently purchased a house. One of the commenters on that post, T Edwards, asked:

Congratulations on your new home. My question is: do you give credit for bringing it into your life to ‘The Law of Attraction’?

I gave a brief reply to the comment at the time, although I realised that there was much more that I could say on the subject, so much so that I thought I’d take this opportunity to devote a post to it!

I think I should start by saying that I use the term Law Of Attraction to describe principles of how the universe works on an energy level, mainly because it is a term that many people know these days and which can therefore be used as a reference point. For me, however, the principles behind what is popularly termed Law Of Attraction represent deep spiritual beliefs, many of which I was first introduced to as a young child and which I’ve come to understand more deeply over the years. I’m still learning! So, while my answer to T’s question in the comments is that I do give credit to the Law Of Attraction for bringing the house into my life, my use of these principles is a much more spiritual one than popular products like The Secret describe.

My husband and I started looking for a new house to buy in January this year. We had owned our own home in South Africa, but had decided to rent when we moved to Scotland until we had become more settled and familiar with the city of Edinburgh and its surrounding countryside, and had a good idea of which area we wanted to live in.

I had started thinking about our ideal house when we first made the decision to move to Scotland and I knew a house purchase would arise in the next year or so. I developed a picture in my head of what it would look like (based on both my and my husband’s intentions, which are thankfully exactly the same when it comes to houses and decoration thereof!), and even drew a floor plan and a 3D picture of what it looked like. This picture was continually refined, and by the time January came round, I could see our ideal house extremely clearly in my head. It had the same status in my mind as the house we owned in South Africa, in the sense that it was as real to me as a house that I had actually lived in. I knew our ideal house intimately!

When it came to the details of our ideal house, we had some non-negotiables as well as some nice-to-haves. We were also clear that the house had to reflect the Divine qualities of love, peace and joy. We were looking for a house that felt like home the second we stepped through the door. In terms of finances, we planned to use the money from the sale of our house in South Africa as a deposit towards buying a house in the UK. Houses in the UK are a tad more expensive than in South Africa – our many Rands gave us a great deposit amount to use here, but unfortunately not enough to purchase a house outright! Nevertheless, we were grateful that we had that money to contribute towards the process as it would keep our mortgage down and make us more attractive to lenders.

The first few months of the house-hunting process were frustrating. Each property we saw matched our requirements to a certain extent, but none included everything we wanted, even when we considered doing renovations. Those that were closer matches were outside our budget, but even those didn’t have the energetic qualities we were looking for.

About four months in, I became very despondent. I started to doubt that we would ever find our ideal house within our budget. I hated the idea that we would have to settle for something far less than we wanted. Even though this was a dark time for me, it was out of this period that I began to clarify my thinking around Flow. I spoke to my guides about it, and I started practicing it in all areas of my daily life. I changed my focus from details and specifics to making Flow my primary focus. I learned to trust that if Flow is present, all else falls into place.

At about this time, the UK started to experience a so-called “credit crisis”, and the news was full of doom and gloom – mortgages were difficult to obtain and house prices were falling. I took the latter quite positively, however – if house prices were falling, it meant we would be able to get more house for our budget! I also chose to ignore the news reports about mortgages, and instead maintain my focus on Flow.

Shortly after this, we walked into the house that we ultimately ended up buying. It felt like home. It matched our intentions perfectly on an energy level. At first glance, it only had some of the non-negotiables that we’d wanted, and none of the nice-to-haves. But, upon closer inspection, we realised that we could easily renovate the house to obtain all but one of the non-negotiables and all but one of the nice-to-haves! Honest reflection showed me that these two unobtainable characteristics were in fact ego-driven wants. I released these, and in the process I realised that these two things that I had thought so important actually weren’t so important after all!

Had there not been a credit crisis, this house would have been out of our budget range by at least £10 000. As it was, we were able to buy it for £30 000 under budget, leaving us with money to spare for all those renovations! Thanks also to some helpful family and friends who are involved in the building trade, we are likely to obtain some hefty discounts on things like kitchen units and bathroom suites.

The actual purchasing process was a beautiful example of Flow. Our dates for giving notice on our flat matched up perfectly with the sellers’ moving date. Through our solicitor, we were put in touch with a financial advisor who organised a mortgage for us at a very good rate. The mortgage application process itself was easy and hassle-free. Our solicitor was amazing – he was efficient and thorough and kept us updated at each step. We essentially sat back and watched the process unfold, doing our small bit (e.g. signing a form, making a telephone call, making a bank transfer – nothing too onerous!) as and when required. In a telephone conversation with the seller at one point, he mentioned to me that he was amazed at how smoothly and easily everything was progressing – I could only agree! With Source energy directing the process, how could it be any different?!

If you’d like to see some pictures of our new ‘hood, you’re welcome to browse through those on our other personal blog.

Surfing The Flow

Don’t you just love it when life flows? I certainly do!

In psychological terms, the word flow is used to describe a state in which we are so fully immersed in an activity that we feel energised, focused and involved, and as a result experience a distorted sense of time and effortless of action. It is an ego-less state in which we are completely present. Flow is a concept integral to the field of Positive Psychology, and its main proponent is the man with the virtually unpronounceable name, Mihály Csíkszentmihályi (those in the know say it is pronounced Mee-high Chick-sent-mee-high-ee, but apparently his friends just call him Mike!).

In spiritual terms, however, flow is quite literally Source energy flowing through us. It is possible to feel this energy flow tangibly. It is a strong and powerful energy stream that contains within it a deep sense of love, joy and peace. It is graceful, abundant and expansive. When Source energy is flowing freely, we experience the psychological state described above in relation to our daily activities.

There is an element of surrender involved in the process, in that flow can’t be forced. It can only be allowed. It is when we get out of our own way that we can be a conduit for Source energy to flow through us into the world. That said, once we’re in the energy stream, there is an interplay between letting it carry us forward and co-creating our journey along the way. We’re not so much going with the flow as we are surfing the flow!

I’m going to be exploring the concept of flow over the next few blog posts, looking at subjects like work, health, relationships and money from the perspective of flow. I’ll also be discussing the topic of how flow relates to manifesting intentions, and the different types of blockages that affect flow. I look forward to you joining me throughout this series, and as always, to hearing your thoughts as we delve into the subject!

10 Things That Make Me Happy

Akemi from Yes To Me tagged me to write about 10 Things That Make Me Happy. What a great meme to spread gratitude for the many wonderful things in our lives! Without further ado, here are ten things that I love:

Connection To Source Energy
My life flows when I allow Source energy to flow through me. I’m continually profoundly grateful for the presence of Spirit in my life.

My “Roomies”
I share a home with my husband of six and a half years and a funny fluffy thing (aka our cat!). I love my husband deeply, and am always grateful for his support and encouragement of who I am and what I do. The funny fluffy thing keeps me company while I work, and in return allows me to cuddle and snuggle into her fur every now and then. If you’d like to read more about our lives, you’re welcome to pop into our other blog, The Chronicles Of MacNoodle.

Bubble Bath
Baths are good. Baths are even better with bubble bath!

Chocolate
Yum. That’s all I have to say.

Access To Information
I love books. I love libraries. I love the Internet. I love reading. And I love learning.

Bagpipes
You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. My Scottish heritage ensures that my heart soars every time I hear bagpipes. I don’t care what others may say, the bagpipes are definitely beautiful music to my ears!

Central Heating And Double Glazing
We used to live in South Africa, which is considered a hot country. And it is hot… in summer! In winter it gets pretty cold (down to zero degrees Celcius, sometimes a bit below). Despite this, there is no central heating and no double glazing, thereby ensuring that one wears ten layers of clothes while huddling around a heater or fire to keep warm. I’m therefore a big fan of the central heating and double glazing that we have here in Scotland. The irony is that I feel warmer during winter living in a so-called cold country than I ever did living in a so-called hot country!

The Colour Blue
Blue, in all its many shades, resonates with something deep inside my soul.

Digital Cameras
I’ve always enjoyed cameras and photography, but digital cameras have made this hobby so much more fun! I love being able to see the photo immediately after taking it. I carry a small Sony camera around with me at all times to snap anything that catches my eye.

Clouds
I’ve always been fascinated by clouds. I can watch them for ages, forming and reforming, the interplay of light and shade….

I know the meme is limited to ten things that make me happy, but I’d like to add an honourable mention for the many people in the blogosphere who write such interesting and fun posts, who leave comments on my blog, and with whom I’ve interacted by email. I’ve never met any of you in person (though I intend to one day!), yet you’re all very special to me. Thank you all!

And lastly… to complete the meme, I hereby tag:
Lucy Lopez at Lucy’s Planet Happiness
Tom Volkar at Delightful Work
Mark Penta at Creative Journey Café

Make Up Your Mind!

The issue of choice has followed me around my whole life. In terms of astrological signs, I’m a Libra. That means that I like balance and harmony. But that also means that I’m notoriously bad at making decisions, endlessly weighing up pros and cons and generally over-thinking things before coming to a considered conclusion. In addition, I’m what Barbara Sher calls a scanner and Margaret Lobenstine terms a renaissance soul. That means that I like variety. But that also means that I struggle to commit to any one thing, flitting between projects according to some schedule known only to my own whimsy.

So, as you can tell, for me, burdened as I am with the vagaries of planet alignment at the time of my birth and the genetic/environment mix that makes up my personality, the ability to make choices doesn’t really come naturally ;).

In one of my posts last week on quantum leaps and the importance of choices, I wrote:

“Triggering a change in our vibrational frequency from one level to another is achieved by means of making a firm decision regarding our intentions and desires. Until we commit to what we want, it remains only a possibility. It is our decision, focus and attention that ensure that it manifests into the physical.”

Similarly, in what must be one of the most quoted quotes in the personal/spiritual development field (and often wrongly attributed to Goethe!), William Hutchinson Murray stated:

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”

Clearly, to live a life we love, the ability to make choices is important. Clearly, judging from what I wrote last week, I know this. But do I put this knowledge into practice? Not always (see above!).

What I do often do, is express preferences. Not the same thing as making a choice at all. Preferences are about potentiality and hope, specifically hope that the universe will oblige by somehow bringing us the things and experiences that we want. Choice is about clarity and certainty, specifically certainty that the universe will work with us to help us create the things and experiences that we want. The concept of choice is empowering. Hoping that the universe will bring us what we want is an expression of powerlessness.

I spent some time over the last few days reflecting on my intentions to see if I had really made a choice about them or whether I was still just expressing a preference. For example, is Love a preference or a choice? Is the energy of Divine Love something that I’m really committed to inviting into my life and expressing with every fibre of my being? Similarly, with other energetic qualities: peace, joy, abundance… these are energetic qualities everyone wants in their lives, right? But is it just a preference, something we daydream about inbetween bouts of fear, anxiety, sadness and scarcity thinking? Or have we really made a choice to align with these energy streams?

Why would we not make a choice regarding what we want? Well, I for one can blame the factors in my opening paragraph :). In addition, for me, I know that I sometimes feel tentative, scared to make the “wrong” decision. However, what I’m learning is that the act of choosing is far more important than what we choose. It is the ultimate act of creativity. If we don’t like what we create, we can choose again and we can choose differently. In Conversations With God, God tells Neale Donald Walsch:

“If there is some aspect of creation you find you do not enjoy, bless it and simply change it. Choose again. Call forth a new reality. Think a new thought. Say a new word. Do a new thing. Do this magnificently and the rest of the world will follow you.”

Just because we make up our minds doesn’t mean that we’re not allowed to ever change them!

Over to you… are you making choices in your life, or expressing preferences? What other reasons can you add to why we may struggle to make choices?

Ask Mags: The Spiritual Life Or The Simple Life?

I am very taken with teachings such as Eckhart Tolle’s and I want to live a life of presence – a spiritual life. But does this mean that I have to give up my possessions and live a simple and austere life? Is it possible to be both spiritually and materially wealthy?

The answer to both of these questions is Yes – yes, you do have to give up your possessions, and yes, it is possible to be both spiritually and materially wealthy. And before you ask, the answer to your next question is No – no, my previous answers are not completely contradictory! Let me explain….

The key to understanding this subject lies in getting clear on the intent behind the decision to create on the physical plane.

When the ego is in charge of our lives, it creates experiences and things for the purpose of definition and identity – in other words, the ego uses the things of the physical plane to define who you are and to give you an identity separate from others. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that this type of “creating” is not really creating at all. Instead, this process is more accurately termed “getting” or “collecting”, as the ego gathers to itself all those experiences and things that can tell a story about who you are. The ego likes to have an answer for the ubiquitous cocktail party question regarding what we do: I am a writer, I am successful, I am a wife/mother/daughter (insert appropriate role here).... It doesn’t matter to the ego whether the identity is positive or negative. I am a successful writer may be a more positive identity than I am a loser and victim of circumstance, but it is an identity nevertheless and the ego will therefore defend it and continue to promote it. Because the ego is so heavily invested in the identity that it has “created”, it suffers when it loses any of the things that go into supporting this identity and to which it is therefore attached.

In a state of presence, however, we are aligned with Source energy. This is the state of I am. This is the state of pure creation. Whereas the ego has to work hard to get everything that it wants, creating from a state of presence is effortless. It flows. The intent behind creation is to experience the physical manifestation of our highest path and purpose. We create because we can – I am, and therefore I choose to create the experience of being a successful writer. Unlike an ego-based life, in a state of presence there is no attachment to anything we create. If something is taken away from us, we do not suffer – after all, we can create the same thing (or even something different) again tomorrow.

To return, then, to your original question: Yes, you do have to give up your possessions, although this “giving up” is not necessarily a physical act of relinquishing all that you currently have in favour of an ascetic life. Rather, to live a life of presence means to give up your egoic attachment to those things that have previously defined you. The ego will rebel against this perceived diminishing of who you are. However, far from making you less than you are, awakening to a state of presence allows the fullness of your being to emerge. When we live in the state of I am, we know that we are already all that we want to be: we are already abundant, we are already joyful, we are already peaceful. This is our natural state and it is ours now. Access to these ways of being are never taken away from us, although we may sometimes not allow them into our lives. We can be both spiritually and materially wealthy. It is our choice.

Tim Brownson: Don’t Ask Stupid Questions

I recently read through the e-book version of Don’t Ask Stupid Questions (There Are No Stupid Questions) by Tim Brownson. Tim is a Life Coach and has a blog called The Discomfort Zone, which I’ve been a fan of for a while now.

Like Tim’s blog, Don’t Ask Stupid Questions made me laugh at least once each page. I love Tim’s sense of humour - it’s off-the-wall and yet spot-on! Our lives are obviously important, but that doesn’t mean we have to be serious and sombre all the time. We can have some fun with personal development, and Tim’s approach encourages us to do just that. Laughter and results can happily co-exist!

Using humour and examples from Tim’s own life and common challenges that his coaching clients experience, the book presents a series of questions that we can ask ourselves to help us step out of our comfort zones and create a life that we love. Each chapter is dedicated to one question and is one or two pages in length, allowing us to stop after each bite-size chunk and mull over the question presented. It is obviously up to you how you approach a book like this; I tend to read through books containing questions and/or exercises (without stopping to do each exercise as it arises) to get the overall framework in my mind before going back and spending time delving into the details. I did this with some of Tim’s book, although I did find myself pausing after many of the chapters and reflecting on the questions presented. In the introduction to the book, Tim also mentions that the chapters can be worked through in any order – I read through the book in the order in which it was presented, although second pass through the book has taken a more scenic detour depending on which questions feel more relevant to me at this time.

Whichever way you choose to read this book, please do not skip the introspection and action asked of you by the questions. These are certainly challenging questions, but they are also most certainly questions that can help you change you life for the better if you allow them to. Tim’s questions made me think right from the get-go. For example, I read the second chapter, Who is the most important person in the world to you?, confident that I knew the answer: me! And indeed, that is the answer… I have so much more to offer the world when I look after myself first. This is not a selfish position in the way we traditionally have used the word selfish, because such kindness to oneself is not done at any expense, least of all at the expense of others. Rather it is a position that acknowledges the priority of one’s own emotional, mental and spiritual health in order to help others reach that state too. I know this, and I practice it, or at least I thought I did, for when I got to the end of the chapter and considered the question (“If you accept that you are the most important person in the world, what can you do differently to demonstrate that belief?”), I realised that I had been neglecting myself and not honouring those things that are important to me. I’ve since starting living up to being my own BFF* and have noticed a significant energy shift in my life for the better.

Don’t Ask Stupid Questions is a practical book that would suit people with fairly analytic minds who are used to the principles of goal-setting and want to become more effective at this. However, Tim has also introduced some more esoteric concepts, like manifesting, into the book, presented in a way that makes them understandable and palatable to people who may never have encountered such concepts. For those of us who are comfortable with both the physical and metaphysical, Tim’s book is a good blend of both.

Don’t Ask Stupid Questions is currently available via Tim’s website in hard copy and e-book format. He is also currently giving away his latest e-book, Know Yourself, Change Yourself, free of charge and you can download this via the link above as well.

[*BFF = Best Friend Forever]

Are You A Bonsai Tree?

I had an epiphany yesterday. I like having epiphanies. Except I prefer it when they don’t come with tears, like yesterday’s did. The tears themselves aren’t so bad – very cathartic, and cathartic is good (it’s even a fun word to say, much like epiphany!). But when the wailing and gnashing of teeth are all over and done with, what I’m left with is one very scary-looking blotchy-faced woman squinting at me from the mirror through puffy eyes and hazy contact lenses. It wasn’t pretty, I tell ya, but it was worth it.

My big epiphany was that, in a few areas of my life, I’m a bonsai tree. Figuratively, that is (although after my lenses had clouded over in protest at the amount of salt water they had to cope with, it was kind of hard to tell from my reflection whether I was animal, vegetable or mineral anymore).

I’m a bonsai tree because I’m keeping myself small when I really want to be a big mighty oak. The irony is that I am already one. The only difference between me and the giants of the forest is that of scale, not of type. I am already that which I want to be.

Why stay small? Why limit my natural propensity for growth? Here are a few reasons of my own:

Space issues
Everyone can find space in their lives somewhere for a bonsai. When you’re small, you fit in anywhere. You don’t dwarf anyone, and you don’t threaten anyone. But, it’s kind of different when you’re a mighty oak. Suddenly, you don’t fit in where you used to. You stand out. You may be a gentle giant, but you’re a giant nevertheless, and giants need space for both their branches and their roots to grow. Other people may not understand. They may think you’re being selfish. They may feel entitled to the space that you claim for yourself. You may feel guilty. You may decide that it’s just easier to stay small to keep the peace.

But… staying small to keep the peace hurts you and ultimately hurts others as well. The world needs mighty oak trees. You are serving the world and Spirit best when you are being the very essence of your oakness.

Care and attention
Bonsais receive a lot of attention to keep them small. Mighty oaks don’t get the same kind of dedicated attention. You know such attention stunts your growth, yet you are scared to want something different. You may have seen what happened to those who did. Those who suddenly became persona non grata, even with members of their own family. Those who couldn’t be controlled by guilt. Those who are now spoken of with a bitterness verging on hate.

But… genuine love isn’t conditional, especially not on you staying small just to make others feel comfortable about their own smallness. And maybe, when you venture out to find your space to grow into a mighty oak, rather than it being lonesome, you discover tree-huggers who love you for your size and strength.

Are you a bonsai tree? Are there any areas in your life where you are keeping yourself small?

Deal? Or No Deal?

I love the TV show Deal Or No Deal. I’m pretty sure that it’s available in various countries, but just in case you haven’t ever seen it, you can find a summary of the game here.

Although the contestant pool for the game is constantly changing, this happens slowly as only one person leaves per game to be replaced the next day by a new contestant. As a result, players remain in the game for an average of about 25 shows, and are fairly well known to the audience by the time their turn to play comes around. The show is therefore personal. And yet… it’s not.

It’s personal because we get to know the players’ stories – from people who’ve overcome major life challenges, to those wanting to take their children on the holiday of a lifetime, to students needing to pay off student loans, to couples getting married and buying houses, to retired folk who want to be able to treat their grandchildren and also live comfortably in their old age… every one of them is special. They are good people. We want them to win big. We want them to have the money. We feel that they deserve it. Then they go home with a small amount of money, and we feel disappointed and gutted. It seems so unfair that the Universe should treat them this way after all they’ve been through. It seems so unfair that good people are not rewarded as they should be.

And yet… it’s impersonal because, at the end of the day, it’s all about energy, and energy just is. Each player has a particular energy vibration. The Universe is not out to “get them”, or reward them. The Universe simply matches the vibration of each person’s energy field. Each player’s reality conforms to their energetic alignment. A friendly, caring contestant may leave the show with very little money, not because they are being punished, but simply because they may be energetically aligned with a scarcity mentality. In a game of money, beliefs related to abundance and scarcity are paramount.

This phenomenon is not confined to a show like Deal Or No Deal. It plays out in every aspect of our lives. The reality of our relationships, career, health and financial circumstances simply matches our energetic frequency.

Does the impersonal nature of energy mean that the Universe doesn’t care about us? No – on the contrary, the Universe is loving and supportive. But it doesn’t make decisions related to worthiness or deservingness. God, the angels and our spirit guides want the best for us. They can guide us along our paths, but ultimately we have free will and they cannot make our choices regarding thoughts, beliefs and actions for us.

What this does mean, is that we are empowered to create a life of abundance in every form. Love, happiness, health, wealth – all are choices that we can make freely and hence all are within our reach. The Universe is abundant, and this abundance is available to all of us all of the time, but it is our decision whether to allow that abundance into our reality. The Universe doesn’t withhold its treasure, but sometimes we turn our backs on it.

When the Universe offers you abundance, what will you say? Deal? Or no deal? It's up to you.